Once upon a time, people only met each other in real life. The way to talk to someone was to actually see them! Now, however, you know whose pictures your boyfriend/girlfriend has liked, you see exactly where they are on Snapchat, and you read all of their subtweets to figure out what they’re thinking—all before getting out of bed in the morning.
With the ability to be in constant communication and have access to this overload of information, social media can cause problems. The good news is there are some benefits, you just have to know how to use it to your advantage. Different phases of a relationship call for different uses of social media.
Before you know each other
Congratulations, you don’t have to worry about not meeting your soulmate due to distance! If there’s a guy or a girl you’ve heard of but rarely see, you can follow them on social media, and now all of the sudden they’ve heard your name too. My mom likes to go through the people who like my pictures, then come to me all excited and say, “I just couldn’t help but notice so-and-so liked your picture,” as if it means we’re dating now (it doesn’t, Mom).
Sliding into the DMs/“talking”
Getting to know each other on social media is very different than real life. It can keep it low key, because while going on dates seems to make you automatically dating nowadays, a 100 day Snapchat streak remains in the realm of friendship. And whenever they do send you something, it gives you time to think before you have to answer. Some people say this is a negative and that our generation can’t communicate in real life, but if you go on a date with someone you’ve talked to mostly on social media, you’ll be able to tell then if real conversation is going to work or not.
Actually dating, yay!
Once you're dating, you’re probably following each other on all forms of social media. It can burn couples out, but there are ways it helps too. One of my friends and her boyfriend decided to Snapchat throughout the day instead of trying to text 24/7 and running out of things to say. It was just random pictures of what they were doing, but it was a nice way to say, “I’m thinking of you.”
Are they cheating?
Uh-oh, Johnny has been DMing Sarah but his girlfriend is Natalie! The problem with social media and cheating is sometimes they aren’t actually cheating. Sometimes a girl gets mad because her boyfriend liked another girl’s bikini picture, or a guy gets mad because his girlfriend keeps retweeting some guy’s funny tweets. It’s just a picture and a tweet, but people get upset because it’s right there to get upset over. This is where communication comes in; you talk about your fears and make sure you’re not overreacting. However, if there is something going on, social media’s probably going to expose it. People think once it’s sent it will either disappear or be deleted, but what if the receiver screenshots it? Proving what someone did just got easier.
Breaking up…sorry!
Usually when a couple breaks up they don’t want to see each other right away. Social media keeps them in touch, but there is a solution. It’s these two nice features called “Unfollow” and “Block.” You don’t have to see them if you don’t want to! Just follow your other very best 800 friends and call it a night.
Cortlin is a high school senior in Auburn,Alabama. She is currently learning about the next steps in her education: taking exams, getting a summer job, preparing for college, selecting a major, and so on. She hopes any knowledge she gains in these areas can be transferred into advice for readers, and hopes her perspective can offer a little insight!
